You have HOW many??

"Are they all yours?"  "I dont' know how you do it."  "I can't even handle my TWO."  "God bless you."
"Did you always want that many?"  "I don't know how you afford it."  "What about college?"  "God Bless You."  "What does your husband do?  "Do you work?"  "God Bless You."
My daily dose, on average about 5-10 times a day.
Everywhere I go, with most, or all of my brood. 
In a world like today, that is in the condition ours is in, where more people are complaining rather
than praising their life, why someone can't just see you smile, and enjoying your life, and figure you're
happy, is strange to me. 
Somedays I answer, understandingly, it's not the norm. 
Other days, it's annoying.
I have gotten better through the years I must say. 
In the beginning, (it started after baby four), it used to really boggle my mind.
I think more so, because I have NEVER been like that. 
If people are different than me, I am the type that may think, I wouldn't do that, but I don't
need to go tell them. 
In fact, it is likely, since they didn't ask my opinion, it wouldn't matter what I thought.
The interest isn't the issue,were used to the staring and stuff, just more the verbal part of it.
The sarcastic God Bless You's are what rank at the top of my annoyance list.
There is a definite distinction between the people that mean it, or the people that use it as a dig. 
I didn't ask if YOU could handle it, in fact it's evident in what your ONE child is acting like,
even as you talk to me.  lol
But on the flip side, there are many lovely people who are simply curious and nice to talk to. 
It wouldn't work for them, and they are just wonder how we do it.  If Roman helps a lot, etc.
People have shared stories of how they weren't able, or they always wanted to but just couldn't. 
Some have said were insane but laughingly, and I laugh back and say yeahhhh, we are.
And the sweet little nanas and pop- pops?  I can't take it....
Their wide eyed, wisdom -filled eyes, coming to tell us their story.
Reminding Roman and I that these are the years, the ones that are most rewarding, the
ones you'll remember forever.
Most of them DID have big families and talk about their holidays now and all their grandbabies....
I can't count the number of them that walk over to us at restaurants and just look down the table. 
They tilt their heads, and pat our shoulders or hug one of the kids-I get goosebumps just thinking
about them.
And sometimes, I'm just as guilty. 
My teenager's girlfriend goes to a church where the pastor's wife is having her tenth baby. 
I asked her so many questions about them, I would have to consider myself a hypocrite, if I
didn't understand that part of it. 
For years, I tried to come up with a general comparison for all who asked. 
It's wasn't  important to me that anyone agree with our choice to "overpopulate", but if I could
come up with a comparison or some sort of general idea, those who were just
completely floored by it all, may just, (a tiny bit) understand. 
I conclude all talks now with family size being decided, just like most choose their occupation. 
It has helped.
In life, we are all built to withstand many different things. 
Not only in tolerance, but talent and ability. 
Some of us are made with more patience than others.  They grow up wanting to be teachers, people
that can sit in a classroom with up to thirty students all day and instruct. 
Others must be made up of 'Butterfly" free stomachs, they can stand in front of judge and jury
and fight for a man's freedom from prison.
The sweet, quiet and to- themselves?  They want to be librarians or file clerks. 
And thank goodness for butt doctors right??  We need them.
Well, for the same reasons, I think family sizes are created.  What you want in life and what's good for you.
There are women and men that want one child.  Plain and simple 
Some want two- how many times have you hearsd,-two hands? two kids. 
And others, three is the magic number.
My husband and I didn't say from Day 1, were gonna have a family of ten.
(although anyone that went to high school with him said that he always said 6).
But time we went on, we always felt an itch, like one more person was meant to be. 
We love the insanity, a playful home, caos.  It is us...
There is always going to be massive piles of laundry and a sport to drive to. 
For some, this would be the ingredients for life's disaster, but that's what makes the world full
of difference.  The things that make us separate from others are one thing, but how people
relay their opinion toward a different choice, is another. 
I'm sure they don't go into their foot doctor and ramble on and on about how insane he is to work
on feet all day, asking explanation after explanation on why he does it. 
But, maybe I'm wrong.
I wish they would know, it's already a little tougher on a large family.  
And I'm not talking the financial.
Any mom to a circus will tell you, most of the time, unlike everyone else, you don't
have days where you are granted a get out of jail free card (except by maybe a good friend
or family member).
There is a "Large Family-It just can't happen list", and on it are things that, unless you want to
continue on the TOLD YOU SO bandwagon, you need to avoid. 
Let me clue you in on our secret club.
First off there cannot be any complaining.  No whining, or venting or break down of the parents. 
Let's say you are having a crazy day and you are a mother of two. 
You wake up to dog pee in the family room, low on milk for breakfast, no clean socks
and are running twenty minutes late.
Later that day, you are standing in the deli line at Acme, and start telling the woman next to you, all about it.  She would probably smile, and say encouragingly, "Aw, it's just one of those days...hang in there."
Now, let's have the same day to a mom of eight. 
I wake up to dog pee, and forget things. 
I have refereed eleven times so far, and have a much better shot at not having enough clean socks. lol
Then I go to the deli. 
If I were to vent, or laugh, about all that didn't go as planned that day, what would happen? 
They would probably think, Hm, shouldn't have had eight kids.
The same goes for our children. 
I have seen people at Target, with kids screaming at the top of their lungs, hanging half way out of
the cart, pulling things off the shelves. 
I'm sure people would judge that, but maybe at the same time,
pity the mom who couldn't have predicted an earlier than normal met down before nap.
If it were reversed, and any of my kids acted even half that bad, I would be sure to be judged harsher.
Theres a woman who chose to have EIGHT KIDS and they act that way! ?
If they can't teach them how to act properly, why'd they have that many?
But the biggest, the most common thing that comes our way, of public opinion, would have to be college. 
The conversations I have been lectured through, I can't even begin to tell you.
If I think back to even when I was growing up, that never seemed to be in discussion.  
When large families, were more a little more common- I don't think it was such a dramatic topic of discussion.
And yes, things were less expensive back then, but its always relative, they were making less money too. 
I don't base my family on the size house we are in right now, what my husband is making at this time,
or what car we are driving this week. 
So why would I base having another baby on how much we are, (or they are ), gong to pay for further education?
If I had a quarter for everytime I heard the question, What about college?  I'd have enough to pay for them to go!
We have our children for eighteen years BEFORE that, and many, many, many after. 
I'm not going to not add to my family, because of the four years in between. 
That's like saying you don't want to have anther baby because of the teenage years...Um, yeah, we just couldn't handle out last thirteen year old, so NEVER again.
My question for those people-Do parents of one, two or three kids have their college money set aside? 
Are they irresponsible?

Health care too....many people are without, it's one of the biggest issues right now in Government. 
At a normal monthly payment, for an average family, for many, is tough---
Could you imagine if we had a bad year in business and applied for a discount insurance? 
What would people say?  Surely more would judge than not.  Saying we didn't plan according.
Shouldn't have had all those kids if you couldn't have afforded to.
I'm not saying you should approve of people just pounding out kids and not paying for them. 
I, in no way want to start a debate about how many is too many- 
Or the latest article I read on those that believe large families are using too much of the earth's oxygen. 
(yes, I am serious).
I'm just talking about my own individual situation, and it isn't asking anyone to flip the bill. 
So next time you see me, remember my club membership, and try not to judge, because you may
have a different lifestyle choice.  Just Kidding-but tell anyone you know that, just in case.
We aren't exempt from days that go wrong, kids that misbehave or an income that fluctuates. 
But none of any of that should make anyone not have the family they dream of having.
More than college funds, and bank accounts, you need faith. 
No matter what job, how many kids, or what you are trying to decide for yourself. 
You need to make choices based on happiness and belief in what is meant to be.  
If there is heart, and love, and trueness, in whatever you are deciding to do, you are making
the choice that is right. 
What a shame if you had to look back, and saw that you COULD have done what would have made you happy....but it just seemed like too much at the time.
The tides don't always just sweep you up, and float you away into the sunset every day. 
Each person is given a boat.  Your job is to fill it with whatver love you have and
everything that can make your journey asea worth sailing.
You must prepare for choppy waters, but more than that, a beautiful ride.
Don't let other people's maps affect the course your looking to travel. 
It won't work for you. 
Life is best when it's all your own.
The only thing that quiets our nay-sayers are three simple words....We love it.
And that friends, is all that matters.
Hugs!