What More Do You Want From Me?

This is the first chapter in my book, that I am taking my dandy old time writing.
I will try to have it finished by the Spring of 2089!   So look out for it-
Just wanting to share!  :)

"The S on your cape is fading Jen."  My friend told me once. 
Huh?  What?  It is not!  Not for one day!
What are you talking about?  What are you trying to say? 
Why are you looking at my cape anyway? 
The S will NEVER fade!  It won't lose an ounce of color, ever. 
It will shine bright for all to see, forever and ever. 
End of discussion, do you hear me?  That's it.

After all, isn't that perfection?  Isn't that what most of us moms in the world try to be? 
Maybe not 100%, but as dang close to it as possible.  Don't lie.  Supermom with a cape. 
Not just any cape either.  A perfect one, ironed and pressed, blowing beautifully in the wind.
A cape almost as nice as our blown out hair and adorable outfit. 
The one that fits perfectly, I might add, on my rockin Zumba lovin, yoga doing, flat stomached
body of mine.  Um, yea, that's  me.  Ya know.
Did I mention that I walk this bod around an (always) clean house, and my kids are never dirty? 
I know, aren't I amazing?  I am also always organized. 
I could tell you my tricks right now but I will be volunteering at school many days. 
I will call you back though because I don't fall behind on things. 
Nor do I procrastinate, forget about anything, or am outdone.

That is my job.  It's actually the first thing every day on my to-do list.  Not to drop a ball. 
After that comes, don't forget red shirt day at school, or be without a checkbook at the dentist. 
Followed up by noting all sports schedule changes, spelling bees, piano or what I'm doing for dinner. 
My list can be endless, but it is life, every mom's life, and we handle it was grace, every single day.

Okay, stop the insanity.  It's a new day-let's get real and start REAL-ITY. 
And to be real, there is one thing that we all need to REALize.
YOU ARE ONE PERSON. 
ONE PERSON WITH ONE BRAIN.
YOU HAVE TWO HANDS, AND TWENTY DIRECTIONS TO GO.
And as one individual, being realistic, we can only do so much that can only go so far. 
Life is unknown, but we are not.  We are AMAZING.  But not perfect- and there it all begins.

A long time ago, there was a meeting that took place. 
It was headed up by a man who stood up wanting to speak to every woman alive at the time. 
So they gathered. 
This speech lasted hours, speaking of all the unbelievable qualities that this sex was given. 
It used words that had never been used before. 
Describing supernatural things, that they would see us do and things WE would
make happen-within months, days, even minutes. 
It talked extensively about new scientific data on moms, revealing a never-before concept. 
That we were, well, perfection.
From there a huge uproar took place. 
Mothers, because of the pedestal we were placed on, were expected to be exactly that, and so it was. 
We believed it until the day that one woman
finally did the unthinkable.
Although she was unnamed in the report, sources close to her say, she was from our area,
and not granting interviews at this time. 
Details aren't entirely clear, but word is, one morning, (drum roll please), she messed up. 
And then, hold your panties, she brushed herself off, and said,
YA KNOW WHAT?  I'M STILL HERE!
I'M STILL AWESOME. 
AND IT"S ALL STILL OKAY. 
The crowds erupted. 
The scientists then went back to their study. 
They dug deeper into their ancient experiments and soon realized there was a mistake. 
Looking back, the data showed these unspeakable qualities, only came from lab rat moms.
Here, after all this time, it was rodents that didn't mess up, the ones that never tripped and fell. 
All these millions of years, we lived a lie.
The news was joyous.
And men and women alike, gave her a standing ovation, and champagne.

It's time to talk yourself down off your personalized ledge of imperfection. 
Even is super powers existed, if you were truly honest, you would probably be pretty darn proud
of yourself (even without ever using them). 
How you're put together, how others see you, and how many things you have crossed
off your list by six pm?  Come on. 
You are worth far more than you ever give yourself credit for. 
All that we are in charge of making happen, and the volume of greatness and love we hold
in our hearts, every single minute?

We do all we can, with the time we have, and the ability that we hold. 
We do our best and that will
forever be good enough-
Say no to more, say no to guilt, say no to any voice that is telling
you it isn't enough-

Which leads me to the most spoke hourly phrase of my day, and what you need to say,
anytime the amount you do is questioned-
What more do you want from me?   :)

Princess For The Day.

"Can I get an "Oh, YEAAHhhh-"
"It's my birthdayyy, gonna partty, like it's my birthhhdayyy-"
What is better than your birthday?  
A day all your own, where you are it, baby.
It is all about you, the star, which is, come on, one of the best things ever.
(1) my family (2) coffee (3) being all about me.

It only comes once a year, one out of 365 days. 
It takes so long to get here
and is over before you get a chance to pee, twice.
So hello, whatttss up, mine is today.....holla!

Crazy as can be, the feeling of it stays the same, but some weird
things happen through the years, don't they? 
Like things you noticed about "old" people when you were young.
But never thought you'd be there-
Number one- member how shocked you were when your parent, didn't
know for a second, how old they were turning?
When you asked them, and they were caught off guard, and had to
think for a minute...
How insane and unimaginable was that, that someone WOULD NOT
know how old they freaking were. 
But every year, for the past few, I DID have to think about it.
"Well, let's see, I was 36 or wait, maybe I was thinking about that
being next year. 
Okay, I was born in 73 and it's 2009"  So let me minus twenty and add...." Please.  IT'S INSANE.

This wasn't one of those years though...
I awoke to  the sound of my husband's voice, "Let me look at you Jenny,
let me see what 38 looks like."
Whateverrr...don't bring me into your swamps of 41...
I still have quite a few years to be an senior citizen like you Roman.  lol
So, here I am, old or not, enjoying the first hours of my
"Princess of the Day" and lovin' it.

The doorbell rang this morning, and Lexi's boyfriend and his little
brother came in, soaking wet from the rain, with a dozen Dunkin Donuts. 
How sweet was that? 
Everyone so far has woken up in a good mood, and only one shift
left of kids to get on the bus before I decide what to do as the star.
I AM NOT CLEANING that's for sure, because in fact, I am the princess.
(In case you forgot).
Oh, it will be time to check my Facebook soon. 
The internet" house of love", where no
matter how many friends you have on there, you cannot NOT be
overwhelmed by the kindness,
(or just boredom on their part so they wrote to you), that
you are shown, as you turn a year older.
By 7 am, I already had almost 30 messages-thank you friends, thank you.
I will, yes I will, enjoy celebrating-right after I sweep up the 100
cheerios on the floor. :)

Another thing that's different?
How far you come from your younger years, with parties at each age or
needing to whip up the town?
Please, no surprises now...I'll be asleep by ten and everyone
will go home.
Now, I just want to chill with people I love, or maybe go to dinner
and a movie with the hubby, every so often.

But the biggest change has got to be, just wanting simplicity on our "special" day.
"Hey, can you guys not argue at all today, as my present?" 
"Don't spend money, just make me a massage coupon." 
"How about everybody just does their chores without needing to be reminded?"
Like you could ever, at nine years old, imagine a great birthday would be everyone in your family getting along, making hot chocolate and playing PAYDAY.
How life has changed. 

We aren't going anywhere this year. 
Roman told me he and the kids, wanted to pick up all my favorite
foods later today and grill on the deck.
(It's raining but supposed to be 55, so we are gonna be so cozy!)
I thought it sounded amazing. 
A plan without my input...the best thing ever. 
And I listened last night, as he and the little ones made me
a cake.
It sounded like it was going great until someone yelled that it was
exploding in the oven.
I snuck in and peeked, and it looked like the batter has a right arm hanging off the side.
Only my cake, would look like a mama with a little baby connected to it.

One more year down, and so many blessings-
With each passing of twelve months, more and more takes place.
Just as my Barbie Mansion amazed me at eight, I never would
have imagined my life would amaze me, ten fold, at thirty eight.
Birthdays definitely change through the years, but when you really think
about it, it's probably not because our expectations became any smaller.
I think it is simply because, our lives became bigger.

Hugs!
Love,
The Princess :)

In Between Seasons

Hey guys-
I just wanted to say it is so crazy but I have NOTHING to do today.
NOTHING.
Well, not nothing..
I did have a dentist apt and I do have to run to the bank, but you know what I mean.
No deadlines, no, mom, you need to be at _ at _, and not a second late, or the president
will call you, type of trips.
No where to go, no one to drive, or drop off, or pick up.
No one has sports, or work. 
Cheerleading has concluded, wrestling season for High School and the little guys, ended Saturday at 1:56, when we jumped in the van.
It always feels really weird.
I am the busy body lover, but every so often, especially in the evenings, its nice to
just chill with everybody.
Having said that, too much of it makes me figity, almost kind of dizzy
(which doesnt make sense, but
what do you want from me?)
I like to "jet set" around in my 15 passenger van...ya know, being cool.
What is next?  Now where?  Oh, I forgot about those things----
What can I make happen?  How can I be proactive and amazing...lol
But around this time every year, and then in summer, there is a lull in insanity-
Usually a wk, maybe two, that sits between these two sports seasons-and I take full advantage of enjoying it!
What should I do? 
Maybe shoot over to Old Navy and look at all their adorable
spring baby clothes? 
Drive home without my cell ringing, and make a nice relaxing dinner? 
Have my beer
at 5:01?  Holla!
I'll let you know, (not that you really care, but I tend to flatter myself when excited)...
Have a great day everybody!
Hugs!

OH MY GOSH, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS!  MY SON IS AT SCHOOL AND WANTS TO KNOW IF HE CAN STAY AFTER AND LIFT!!!!!!!  And so is life........lol

THE BEST YOUTUBE VIDEO

Once again, if you know me, I have posted this YOU TUBE video (or you've probably even watched
it yourself).
It is the most beautiful video-and shows what our world can scare you into being-or what you
can just chose to do, out of belief of what you WANT it to be :)
Enjoy :)
Hugs!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4

Exercising? Ugh.

I need to do it.
I need to motivate myself to do it, every day.
I need to wake up knowing it is the best thing for my energy level.
I need to wake up knowing it is the best thing for my body.
I need to greet it, at the same time in the morning, so that it becomes part of my schedule.
I need it to even THINK about getting in a bathing suit this summer.
I need to remember without it, the stretched skin that with each child, becomes an even bigger pile,
hanging here, will never deflate.
I need to remind myself that I am almost 38 and it's not going to disappear on it's own anymore.
I need to do this, so that my pants don't look like I have a muffin baking in the top part of them.
I need to WANT to do this!!!!!!
So why don't I????
Wish me luck!!!
Hugs :)

Got A Teen?

Okay.  Moodiness is surrounding me. 
There is no escaping it.  No one is helping to ease it. 
It has invaded this house, and probably will not exit for the next eighteen years.
The rolling of eyes, the words that no matter what size, are exaggerated,
"But Moooooooommmmmmmm."
Even the way they walk in and out of the room you are in, like the weight of the world
has attached itself to their butts, and won't let go.
I know I was one, but forget how my parents reacted to all these antics of mine.
Maybe it's MY personality as a mom.
I mean, I tend to be sarcastic, and absolutely harassable.
So, (since my parents were mature), maybe I don't recall the comments that I make, having been said.
I'm sorry, it takes a lot, (and I mean a lot), of self control,  to not react and say, exactly how you
feel they are acting.  In fact, it takes a lot of control to not laugh in their face sometimes.
There are moments, that they are being totally serious, and I have just busted out hysterical. 
You cannot use every ounce of your might, and hold it in....it just HAS to be a joke--the things they are describing.
Girls more than boys of course, with that example, but the insanity in totally different ways.
Anyone with sons or daughters, within this age bracket, is feelin me right now.
Their daily dose, sometimes more than others, depending on how lucky you are, is probably a little
gift from God.
It's helping ease your transition from addicted, to letting go. 
His little creative concoction, that he gives each hormonally imbalanced teen, to make it a tad easier to
help untie the apron strings, a little at a time.
They can drive you so insane, that I have heard of parents, willing to let them leave for college at 15 1/2.
But so, is the circle of life.
Okay, so in this house we have three right now. 
Three, out of whack, could snap at any second, kids, and they are all completely differently insane.
Our oldest Lexi, was never drama crazy. 
Don't know if we lucked out with who she hung out with, but she is so much (and always has been)
like her father, who doesn't play that game, so I think it wouldn't have been her, no matter what. 
She didnt have it in Ga, and we moved back to Pa her sophmore year, and she doesn't have it here.
She never needed to have the HOLLISTER clothing, always wanted to put stuff into her own style. 
So nothing with that dept either.  She's always been where she says, calls when she's not coming home. 
We've always called Lexi, a great, "pave the way and get us into this parenthood journey", kid.   
Having said that, she tends to have issues in the "non motivated" category. 
And has a room that a pig sty would win a blue ribbon before. 
The hormones tend to show, with her when she is "sooo annoyyyyyyed."
which can be all day or simply, ten minutes.
Her boyfriend hears it every time he walks by, or sits down.  
We are all annoying-and you probably would be to her, too. 
You will also (again, like her dad) lose her, if you ramble on with a lecture or instructions-just tell
her what you need her to do and be done.
She loves her siblings and with how annoying everyone is, she isn't too annoyed by them very often.
Good big sis and very proud of all of them-
She and her friends tell me what's goin on and we laugh a lot.  She is good about
letting me in her life-
I love that.  But again, wear a hard hat when entering her room.
Now we move onto Gabe.  Here we have our first example of a boy. 
My oldest son, so we are learning the difference between boys and girls...very strange-
The strangest to me, would fall upon being a woman...and not understanding, for a second, how
there cannot be ANY detail, whatsoever, to ANYTHING that is said. 
Like most men, he leaves me, (and any female) wondering about any "main ingredient" to a story.
He can make some massive statement, that leaves your chin on the ground, wondering what, or
how the heck?  And immediately, leave the room....
I follow, needing to know more, and I become the annoying one. 
"Mommmm, I don't knowwww....why do you need to know everyyyytthinngggg...."
The drama with boys is so opposite from the girls---your ears aren't bleeding from stories but more dehydrated, if you will. 
There isn't enough to even formulate a story in your mind.  It's just not right.  It's not normal.
Gabe is very open, but quiet.  He is such a good boy when it comes to letting you still hug him, or show emotion. 
Not for long, but I am allowed a few seconds here and there, which I know is hard, but he's good about.
He allows me to still be his mom that way....for me.
I would say his annoyance, (which turns into mine), is his position in the family.
Having so many siblings is great sometimes, and not so great others. 
And Gabe would definitely rank #1, in being the easiest annoyed by the little guys. 
He likes organization, things in their place, and little noise.  And that doesn't come along often around here.
Things tend to get loud when he's in the room because they don't listen to him when he gets mad. 
And the fire is fueled.  They run by, his leg gets stuck out, people trip into a pile. 
He says things to egg them on....they start to cry....the oldest brother job position. 
Then I have to be referee so I'm annoyed.  He's also a mumbler...I cannot understand half of what he says, so I get annoyed.  There already isn't enough TO be said, so let me hear you!
But every so often, I see him teaching wrestling moves to his brothers in the basement or picking up the baby
and just playing with her...and its heartwarming....
I know it's in-there, it's just being a teenager.
Our last and final contestant, is Reilly...our thirteen year old daughter.
The heavens parted with Ry was born.  Seriously.  She has always been a very in touch little girl,
and a born "mama". 
She looooovessss kids, loves organizing, and makes everything a big deal when it happens, like it's happening to her. 
She will tell you how she feels about things, and would really do anything for anyone. 
There have been numerous times, we are at a sporting event, and come home to the entire house clean. 
She loves to do things for people, and has always said she actually LIKES it.  God bless her.
Having said that, just as she loves to express her feelings to you-
oh my, does she ever, about everything else under God's green earth.
A book is written, on a daily basis, with every single tiny detail, of every word spoken, and is
then put into the LIBRARY OF REILLY, to re-read to us again, later.
It takes at least twenty minutes for that girl to tell you the beginning of what happened today in homeroom, because it takes that long to describe (simply) the setting, and what everyone was wearing...
Like that has any relevance in why the teacher gave his Science test,  two days early.
Then you have to understand how big of a deal everything that happens truly is. 
I mean, life threatening.  And she is serious. 
Her face gets this weird look and the arms move in every direction, the voice shakes,
and then gets really quiet....
"No, mom, you just, oh my gosh, you don't even understand, it's just, oh my gosh, mom...totally insane,....and we were all like, totallllyyy freaking out...I'm not even kidding." 
Roman and I just look at each other. 
So here we have the "clean freak, sweet emotion" example, but drama out the ears, until the cows
come home.
There is no EASY teen people....and not enough space here to list the daily occurrences or what
they're all about. 
I think the best to remember is that they are all divided.  
Made up of bits and pieces of the things that will drive you nuts for a while-in all different ways. 
Along with a few dibs of their sweetness, you remember loving for the first twelve years, so much.
In fact, that's the part of this time,, that is kind of funny to watch. 
Just as the personalities vary, so do the qualities, that are "challenging" you to stay sane.
The important part of it, is that they stay respectful and you stay encouraging. 
I love that each of them still seeks me out- to confide in me, and talk to me about things that are going on.
I had that with my mom, and it was so important for me to have with my kids.
You don't always have to have your head on straight, you're only human.
They will tempt you sometimes to pack their
bags and drop them at the train station with a one way ticket. 
But stay true to what you want them to take from you and this time in life.
Words hurt-
Don't get too caught up in it....they don't mean to be unbalanced loonitics.
Underneath this mask of disguise, is still your little boy or girl...and they'll be back....I promise.
We just have to keep praying ,we make it til then, and we will....:)
Hugs!

Flip a Coin.

Just flip a freakin' quarter-
If your kids are sick-Sinus', horrible headache, ear infection, or stomach pains-
Throw one in the air-
Go to your wallet and yell out heads or tails, to tell you if you should keep them home.
You cannot win!
First of all, you can't win with the right or wrong...
You can let them go to school and feel great, and you're in the clear.
You can keep them home and they run around after the first hour on the couch, like it's gym class.
You can let them stay, and their puking within fifteen minutes of when they'd be on the bus.
Or you can let them go, and get a call from the nurse by nine a.m.
Two ways of right and two ways you were wrong-
And you know, even if you are a great fortune teller, you can't win anyway.
The school has this two sided approach to whatever your choose to do-I love them dearly, but it's true.
If the kids are sick and they're home, there's a letter generated that they are missing school
and you need to know that this can become an issue.
If you send them, and they call you, and they then tell you this (is also) an issue. 
You shouldn't have sent them.
So, my morning lesson?  Flip a quarter, dime, nickel, or penny.
If you live near Atlantic City, go to the roulette table.
The odds there are just like predicting the flu, a gamble.
Have a good one, off to make some jello for my patients :)
Hugs !

Team Work-:)

There's nothin like middle of the night puke-
The sound of footsteps, the little (or big) voice, almost in warning mode, and then the impact.
Whether they make it to the toilet, or the sink, or some ends up on your comforter, the pity
takes over your being. 
Not just because you know how crappy it feels to throw up, (really, what is worse, ever?) but
because you would take it from them in a heartbeat.
In this house, last night, it came, almost to a tee, at the exact second my baby was waking for a feeding.
I had just gotten her out of her crib, when I heard someone heaving. 
It was my fifth grader, who insisted he would feel better after taking a shower.  So in he went and I went to breastfeed.
About ten minutes later, my three yr old, who had come into our room earlier, and was sleeping there,
started throwing up on her pillow.
My dear husband, who had to work AFTER work yesterday, (at a salon that can only
have repairs done when they're not open), had just gotten home, and been sleeping only about an hr.
Although he needed to get his bearings straight, he helped me get her out and
things organized.
Then I took the baby, and the two patients, downstairs to make up the "sick ward".
I had to run up to get another pillow, and saw Roman, standing at the sink, scrubbing something
that must have gotten hit by chunks.
There he was on one hr of rest, cleaning.
I grabbed what I needed and smiled, to which he said, do you need help? 
Do you need me to do anything?
In the chaos of life, no matter what the issue or saga, or even daily moments are, isn't that all we want?
Someone to just simply offer to lend a hand, or grab an end here and there, and help you carry
something, even if it's just for a minute?
Everything was handled, and he got to get back to sleep, God bless him, but those seven
words were priceless.
I love team work. 
But even more I love having someone that I just know has my back, even when I'm cool with
handling things.
When he gets home today, I'm gonna tell him what his continued "assistance" means to me...
I know he's heard it through the years, but I think it may be one of those phrases that never
gets old to share with people that are truly there for you.
I know not every man is built with that part, doing something without needing to be asked, and luckily he didn't miss that additive on the production line.
I get to stay home, so although I'll be tired, being sleep deprived doesn't affect me like it does someone who is performing physical labor for nine hours this afternoon.
If you have a teammate in life, make sure you are telling them how it makes you feel to have them.
We are very blessed to have an extra set of hands, especially at three in the morning. :)

Hugs!

Cartoons Of Today

Someone PLEASE get me either earplugs, or a bandanna for my eyes-
I cannot believe the difference in the cartoons that my kids watch now and then ones I did...
And now with the BOOMERANG channel, we can even revisit, and prove it.
The shows on for kids of today, of course with some exceptions, are full of either
a good amount of violence, whining voices and even cleavage.
Seriously, do you see some of the women that are "fighting" in some of the Cartoon Network shows? 
They have big boobs!  What the heck?
My younger ones love Calliou...people, seriously, could Calliou, who I keep swearing is a girl,
be more of a whiner if he tried?  
If he says MOMMMYYYYYY, one more time today, I am going to beat his ass.
And the (ever so not entertaining) shows my little boys like to watch?
Ben10, Total Drama Island, Ed Edd and Eddy?  Are you kidding me? 
What the point is to any of those?
I really, truly, can't understand.
They fart as they stab some other guys heart with their sword.
I'm not even prude, I love the semi-adult humor in Sponge bob, Ice Age and Shrek. 
It keeps parents WANTING to take kids to the theatres and stay awake at the same time!
But breasts and talking about pooping?
Did the Pink Panther or Papa Smurf do that?
It is just really far from even what was "walking the line" back them...
Even if I wanted to take my older kids to see a classic horror movie, my favorites back then and still now,
I'd have to prepare them for VERY GRAPHIC killings, and of course, soft porn. 
Somewhere along the lines, the public must have demanded it.
There is so much crappy stuff replacing the old time, (more wholesome), television/movie industry. 
Our kids have to go from age 3 watching Sesame straight to bizarreness, Pokemon. 
Nick Jr has some cute shows, (Oswald is adorable) and Disney's Suite Life makes me laugh, really.
I have even seen a few more on some other channels that I don't mind them watching.
But from a mother's standpoint, I really wish the executives would slow the progress of innocence.
The kids will watch anything exciting, loud and busy, but why Elmo can't keep telling us about HIS WORLD, really bums me out.
Here's wishing more of our childhood could still be around on a daily basis-
It may not still be like the Dukes of Hazard days, but I'd give anything to only have to explain why some cute chic's shorts look like that.
Have a great day!
Hugs!

It's Goin Fast-

Ever just see a picture and think, how the heck are my kids so old?
I'm not talking about Lexi being a Sr, (cried that story to you last week), but really, some
minutes it just hits you?
I found a picture taken at the holidays and just stared at it-three kids, (of mine), pretty much as tall
as their father, posing together.
Not that I thought they'd stay little forever, but I think sometimes life just goes so fast that unless
it every so often, hits you between the eyes, you just don't see it coming.
One day you just wake up and the car seat and diaper bag are simply missing. 
There are no more juice boxes, and you and your girls are sharing UGGS.
You have to look up, even if just a few inches, to tell your son to clean his room....and the endless
hanging on you becomes merely a distant memory.
I still have little guys, and will for a while, but I have THREE teenagers.
Three kids that are old enough to go on dates and watch a Rated R movie.
Sometimes I even see them talking to each other, and hold onto your seat, without me making them.
One actually asked advice of another one last week!! 
Isn't that absolutely insane?  I KNOWWW!!!
It's crazy to hear their stories, and remember those times, cause it wasn't too long ago that it was me
doing it with MY mom.
Shouldn't it have taken longer to get to this place?
God bless us all because life is like a bullet.
Just wanted to share my amazement, cause it hit me again today-that's all.  :)
Hugs!

Here's the picture----

MY CIRCUS

This day will be just great as I wake in early morn
As I stumble out of bed and stop on kernels of popcorn.
"It's gonna be a new day!",  as I walk into the hall
Moving things out of my way, and tripping over my son's ball.
Of course it is still dark out, all my neighbors are asleep
But my one year old is rising, for the dawn she likes to greet.
"Shh" I say, don't wake them, this early, one is sure enough
And down the stairs we go to pile her with lots of stuff.
Why would any channel have a show at six am?
Let's go find your Barney tape and watch it once again.
I begin to make the coffee, and who's footsteps do I hear?
Two others are awake, around the corner they appear.
Cereal is poured, and in just two seconds juice is spilled
After just one bite they both insist that they are filled.
Stop watching your cartoons, can't you see were in a rush?
We need to save ten minutes just to find a single brush.
Home from all my errands, coats off, I start to sigh
Walking by the bin of laundry, that has reached it's all time high.
The afternoon goes crazy, as it always seems to do
"MOM, I FINGER PAINTED!"  "Yea, that's great, but you used glue!"
Husbands home for dinner, what exciting should I make?
A turkey with potatoes, from your dream you need to wake.
Bedtime is coming up, but tonight were out of luck
Running low on milk, so we pile into the truck.
Tub time is a nightmare, water stains upon the floor
As I leave to get the towels, those little buggers lock the door.
Bring them all downstairs, "Ok, I'll read you each one book."
"Who goes first tonight?", as they both give me a look.
We say our prayers, jump in bed, and kiss them all goodnight
"I'll see you in the morning, and I'll leave on the hall light."
Giggles last a minute, and sometimes they try to stall
But before long eyes are shut, and there's quiet in the hall.
It always is a saga, and it's always very busy
But how good is a soda if it isn't really fizzy?
I run around, but when I'm still, all I do is stare
At piggies, and big smiles, and their different colored hair.
I have my own small circus, that I can't believe we made
And there's not one thing at all, that I would ever trade.
This Thanksgiving, I give thanks, for my three clowns most of all
For the laundry, and the lost brush, and the spilled juice and the ball.
For the shuffle, and the errands, and the oh-so-dirty rugs
For the quiet time with Mommy, and the kisses, and the hugs.
For my humor and the love, that I can give to them each day
For the family God has blessed me with, in each and every way.

(My Thanksgiving prayer  in 1997 at our family dinner-and I thought I had a circus then, if I only knew)

Hugs!

You have HOW many??

"Are they all yours?"  "I dont' know how you do it."  "I can't even handle my TWO."  "God bless you."
"Did you always want that many?"  "I don't know how you afford it."  "What about college?"  "God Bless You."  "What does your husband do?  "Do you work?"  "God Bless You."
My daily dose, on average about 5-10 times a day.
Everywhere I go, with most, or all of my brood. 
In a world like today, that is in the condition ours is in, where more people are complaining rather
than praising their life, why someone can't just see you smile, and enjoying your life, and figure you're
happy, is strange to me. 
Somedays I answer, understandingly, it's not the norm. 
Other days, it's annoying.
I have gotten better through the years I must say. 
In the beginning, (it started after baby four), it used to really boggle my mind.
I think more so, because I have NEVER been like that. 
If people are different than me, I am the type that may think, I wouldn't do that, but I don't
need to go tell them. 
In fact, it is likely, since they didn't ask my opinion, it wouldn't matter what I thought.
The interest isn't the issue,were used to the staring and stuff, just more the verbal part of it.
The sarcastic God Bless You's are what rank at the top of my annoyance list.
There is a definite distinction between the people that mean it, or the people that use it as a dig. 
I didn't ask if YOU could handle it, in fact it's evident in what your ONE child is acting like,
even as you talk to me.  lol
But on the flip side, there are many lovely people who are simply curious and nice to talk to. 
It wouldn't work for them, and they are just wonder how we do it.  If Roman helps a lot, etc.
People have shared stories of how they weren't able, or they always wanted to but just couldn't. 
Some have said were insane but laughingly, and I laugh back and say yeahhhh, we are.
And the sweet little nanas and pop- pops?  I can't take it....
Their wide eyed, wisdom -filled eyes, coming to tell us their story.
Reminding Roman and I that these are the years, the ones that are most rewarding, the
ones you'll remember forever.
Most of them DID have big families and talk about their holidays now and all their grandbabies....
I can't count the number of them that walk over to us at restaurants and just look down the table. 
They tilt their heads, and pat our shoulders or hug one of the kids-I get goosebumps just thinking
about them.
And sometimes, I'm just as guilty. 
My teenager's girlfriend goes to a church where the pastor's wife is having her tenth baby. 
I asked her so many questions about them, I would have to consider myself a hypocrite, if I
didn't understand that part of it. 
For years, I tried to come up with a general comparison for all who asked. 
It's wasn't  important to me that anyone agree with our choice to "overpopulate", but if I could
come up with a comparison or some sort of general idea, those who were just
completely floored by it all, may just, (a tiny bit) understand. 
I conclude all talks now with family size being decided, just like most choose their occupation. 
It has helped.
In life, we are all built to withstand many different things. 
Not only in tolerance, but talent and ability. 
Some of us are made with more patience than others.  They grow up wanting to be teachers, people
that can sit in a classroom with up to thirty students all day and instruct. 
Others must be made up of 'Butterfly" free stomachs, they can stand in front of judge and jury
and fight for a man's freedom from prison.
The sweet, quiet and to- themselves?  They want to be librarians or file clerks. 
And thank goodness for butt doctors right??  We need them.
Well, for the same reasons, I think family sizes are created.  What you want in life and what's good for you.
There are women and men that want one child.  Plain and simple 
Some want two- how many times have you hearsd,-two hands? two kids. 
And others, three is the magic number.
My husband and I didn't say from Day 1, were gonna have a family of ten.
(although anyone that went to high school with him said that he always said 6).
But time we went on, we always felt an itch, like one more person was meant to be. 
We love the insanity, a playful home, caos.  It is us...
There is always going to be massive piles of laundry and a sport to drive to. 
For some, this would be the ingredients for life's disaster, but that's what makes the world full
of difference.  The things that make us separate from others are one thing, but how people
relay their opinion toward a different choice, is another. 
I'm sure they don't go into their foot doctor and ramble on and on about how insane he is to work
on feet all day, asking explanation after explanation on why he does it. 
But, maybe I'm wrong.
I wish they would know, it's already a little tougher on a large family.  
And I'm not talking the financial.
Any mom to a circus will tell you, most of the time, unlike everyone else, you don't
have days where you are granted a get out of jail free card (except by maybe a good friend
or family member).
There is a "Large Family-It just can't happen list", and on it are things that, unless you want to
continue on the TOLD YOU SO bandwagon, you need to avoid. 
Let me clue you in on our secret club.
First off there cannot be any complaining.  No whining, or venting or break down of the parents. 
Let's say you are having a crazy day and you are a mother of two. 
You wake up to dog pee in the family room, low on milk for breakfast, no clean socks
and are running twenty minutes late.
Later that day, you are standing in the deli line at Acme, and start telling the woman next to you, all about it.  She would probably smile, and say encouragingly, "Aw, it's just one of those days...hang in there."
Now, let's have the same day to a mom of eight. 
I wake up to dog pee, and forget things. 
I have refereed eleven times so far, and have a much better shot at not having enough clean socks. lol
Then I go to the deli. 
If I were to vent, or laugh, about all that didn't go as planned that day, what would happen? 
They would probably think, Hm, shouldn't have had eight kids.
The same goes for our children. 
I have seen people at Target, with kids screaming at the top of their lungs, hanging half way out of
the cart, pulling things off the shelves. 
I'm sure people would judge that, but maybe at the same time,
pity the mom who couldn't have predicted an earlier than normal met down before nap.
If it were reversed, and any of my kids acted even half that bad, I would be sure to be judged harsher.
Theres a woman who chose to have EIGHT KIDS and they act that way! ?
If they can't teach them how to act properly, why'd they have that many?
But the biggest, the most common thing that comes our way, of public opinion, would have to be college. 
The conversations I have been lectured through, I can't even begin to tell you.
If I think back to even when I was growing up, that never seemed to be in discussion.  
When large families, were more a little more common- I don't think it was such a dramatic topic of discussion.
And yes, things were less expensive back then, but its always relative, they were making less money too. 
I don't base my family on the size house we are in right now, what my husband is making at this time,
or what car we are driving this week. 
So why would I base having another baby on how much we are, (or they are ), gong to pay for further education?
If I had a quarter for everytime I heard the question, What about college?  I'd have enough to pay for them to go!
We have our children for eighteen years BEFORE that, and many, many, many after. 
I'm not going to not add to my family, because of the four years in between. 
That's like saying you don't want to have anther baby because of the teenage years...Um, yeah, we just couldn't handle out last thirteen year old, so NEVER again.
My question for those people-Do parents of one, two or three kids have their college money set aside? 
Are they irresponsible?

Health care too....many people are without, it's one of the biggest issues right now in Government. 
At a normal monthly payment, for an average family, for many, is tough---
Could you imagine if we had a bad year in business and applied for a discount insurance? 
What would people say?  Surely more would judge than not.  Saying we didn't plan according.
Shouldn't have had all those kids if you couldn't have afforded to.
I'm not saying you should approve of people just pounding out kids and not paying for them. 
I, in no way want to start a debate about how many is too many- 
Or the latest article I read on those that believe large families are using too much of the earth's oxygen. 
(yes, I am serious).
I'm just talking about my own individual situation, and it isn't asking anyone to flip the bill. 
So next time you see me, remember my club membership, and try not to judge, because you may
have a different lifestyle choice.  Just Kidding-but tell anyone you know that, just in case.
We aren't exempt from days that go wrong, kids that misbehave or an income that fluctuates. 
But none of any of that should make anyone not have the family they dream of having.
More than college funds, and bank accounts, you need faith. 
No matter what job, how many kids, or what you are trying to decide for yourself. 
You need to make choices based on happiness and belief in what is meant to be.  
If there is heart, and love, and trueness, in whatever you are deciding to do, you are making
the choice that is right. 
What a shame if you had to look back, and saw that you COULD have done what would have made you happy....but it just seemed like too much at the time.
The tides don't always just sweep you up, and float you away into the sunset every day. 
Each person is given a boat.  Your job is to fill it with whatver love you have and
everything that can make your journey asea worth sailing.
You must prepare for choppy waters, but more than that, a beautiful ride.
Don't let other people's maps affect the course your looking to travel. 
It won't work for you. 
Life is best when it's all your own.
The only thing that quiets our nay-sayers are three simple words....We love it.
And that friends, is all that matters.
Hugs!

Seriously?

Seriously, did I just freaking order a cap and gown?
Did I really just write a checkmark next to those words and total an amount?
Was I sitting next to an "almost woman", who was in second grade, literally, three years ago??
I cannot take it.
I'm sure this won't be my last rant and whine on the topic, I can't help it. 
And although I'm at the top of the list for emotional, it will probably NEVER become easier, starting
this process of "lasts"....
And added to it, I've never done it before, so it's crazy!
As I sealed the envelope I thought oh my.  Here it is....over half way through senior year,
and I am denying that it is going like the speed of light.
I've wanted it to trickle by so I could embrace SLOWLY, these months...
Her still hanging out and eating with us. 
The Saturdays she wants to rent a movie in the afternoon or just run to Wawa with me to get a
French Vanilla.
But it's not going very slow----it's past the send your baby photos for the yearbook, and now this. 
The screaming at the top of my lungs, while she clicked send for each of her college applications, has come and gone.
And running to the mailbox every day, for envelopes that will determine where she will be living (without me)
this coming summer, will be over in the next week or two.
The only thing that has worked, to keep me off needing therapy, is choosing to look at all of
this "newest journey",  is seeing it through her eyes.
And for those that haven't been here yet, it works, a lot.
Just as she has completed her first phase of life, I have completed my second. 
I'm not DONE by any means, but we are getting ready to close the chapter of "creating someone good to put
out into our world." 
And my book has tears on these last few pages.  
Not because I didn't know this day was coming. We all know.
I got as much time as anyone gets, and although it went too fast, and she will always be my baby, I did
every ounce of what I could, with the time I had.
But this is such an exciting time for her (and her friends) and being part of all these moments is so awesome.
These next months to come, (and actually the last few), have been fun and  will only continue to be. 
She and her friends were talking about their Sr Week house and who was going to be there.
We are planning a great graduation party and getting ready to choose which picture to use in her annoucements.
Her girlfriends, and her sweet boyfriend, hang here all the time, I am so blessed.  I love that.
The years we've had don't seem long enough yet to almost be dropped off at college.
But they are, and it's here....and you can cry every day and be a basketcase, or you can embrace it and be thrilled.
I look at her and know she is going to leap into Act 2 of her life with endless possibility.
She has become a beautiful daughter, sister and (just about) friend. 
You can't get your time back, so make the most of the days while you have them.  I'm so glad I did.

 Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One of the Best Songs Ever!

Okay, so if you're a good friend of mine or a family member, chances are I have either begged you
(or forced to you), to listen to the song LITTLE WONDERS by Rob Thomas.
I think I have even posted it under my profile on Facebook once or twice.
Well, get over it, I'm talking about it again! :)
I know there are a million and one tunes that make your eyes fill up, or give you goosebumps.
There are another million that have words that hit home to whatever mood you may be feeling that day.
But people, this song is just awesome, and really speaks to all of us about what life is about.
Not the huge, big things, but the little moments, the "small hours". 
It touches on your life no matter what you do or who you are.
Whether you are single with dreams, young or old, married with a family, divorced, even an outlook for children.
The twists and turns of life will always be here, time falls away, but these small hours, still remain.
PLEASE, if you are having a great day and just want to keep smiling, or when things just aren't going your way, turn it on and close your eyes to the words...
It's called Little Wonders because it speaks wonders...
Hugs!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsT2URr1Igc

Who are the Jones' Anyway?

I was at the Exton Mall the other day next to two mom's who were drinking coffee. 
I wasn't paying much attention, (except that I wished I had Starbucks), until one of them started
talking rather loud, and began to rant on and on about "Keeping up with Jones' ". 
She talked about her things, and then some other women she knows things, and how hard it is....
They sat going on and on, (I left a few times), about society, and all the demands of life, especially
when you are raising a family...
Which got me thinking, now that I'm a "blogger"!!  lol
I wonder how many people we know like this?  Women (or men) wanting or trying to be this unattainable picture of perfection.  A member of the Jones Fam.
I've talked about the perfect mom before but do any of you know the people like this woman?
I wanted to tell this girl, stop the act.  Stop the worry-it's gotta be exhausting.
The constant looking around, wondering if anyone is judging you. 
Miscroscoping every move you make.  Thinking others have it so much easier.
Most people are just like you I'm sure-
Good years, bad weeks, sometimes falling upon harder times.
Who are the Jones' ? Those dang Jones'!
The mom and dad with 2.5 kids, white picket fence, cute dog, and a paycheck that handles
everything coming their way?
The couple that looks great every time you see them?  Leave It To Beaver times one hundred?
Those that live without a care in the world which makes people like us, who stress about a noise
coming from the engine in our mini van because it will take the money you need to repair you roof,
seem unusual.
Not a care?  Or does it just seem that way?
I saw on a morning show last week that 70% of the U S is living paycheck to paycheck.
That means that 70% of the people you see driving those awesome cars, living in those huge homes
and wearing the clothes you could dream of putting on, CANNOT AFFORD IT.
Well, maybe they can, but it hurts.
Yet, no matter what we hear or believe, even how we view people like that, we want so badly to
look like it.
No one would dare brag about getting a final notice for water. 
Or that their cell phone company gave them a payment arrangement for the third month in a row.
Why the gray streak in their hair hasn't been touched up or why their kids don't go to private school anymore.
It may BE more normal than not, but even those that have been there, (or are now), would
probably make a face like they had never heard such a think-
WOW, THAT MUST SUCK, I'M SO SORRY.
We, as human beings, in 2011, have to cut the crap.
In BREAKING DOWN OF US INCOME, it states that the average median household income is
$46,326.00,  that equals out to be $3215 and some change, a month, take home.
I never knew it could go so far--------hmmmmm.
The best thing ever would be a TAKE YOUR CREDIT FOR THE DAY, day.
A day when every bank, lender, or family member, took from everyone what was still owed on,
and you haven't paid outright for.
Would that not be great for those that feel "less lucky"?
Can you imagine the type of cars that would be driving alone on the road?  What people would be wearing or what jewelry or clothing they would still have available?
Endless amounts of people, walking the streets in sweats from four yrs ago, and only a handful
of Gucci bags would be on arms around the country.
My kids would finally have proof that the people "shopping" all the time, aren't always rich.
A few years ago we gave up our plastic.  Since then, we explain that when we are out of money,
we are out of things to do. 
It isn't always easy, trying to explain why we seem to be the only ones  EVERY SINGLE FRIDAY AND SATURDAY not at dinner, or the movies.
It's been a lesson.  And although we balance the "things we do" with "homemade fun", it's a hard concept to teach.  That we PAY for things as we go.  Great lesson for my daughter that will be leaving for college this summer.
We lost big in the real estate market a few years back, along with part of our
ego and 75% of our dignity.
The awesome thing about your dignity though, for those that may not know, is when it takes a dip,
your humility takes an elevator rise to the top.
It goes straight to the driver's seat, and takes you places you never would have gone without loss.
Four year ago, we lived in a seven bedroom, 3864 sf home, with (almost) perfect credit.
We had five properties and a savings account. 
Although we always sacrificed having a big family, it had paid off.
We didn't go crazy taking trips or buying stuff-we will forever be in a budget-mode.
So, besides building our new house, most of any profits through those years, we tended to roll into
our next investment.
It was more lax though, and that was nice.
Our plan was to have a property for each child at retirement since we are self employed. 
We were almost there, but God had a different plan.
Business went "south" in the south.  lol
So after much discussion, we packed up the family and moved back North.
It was a very hard time, wondering why these companies with our good-standings, wouldn't work with us.
We juggled this for two years, hoping and praying that something would sell, or someone would come along...but it just wasn't meant to be.
The stories you hear about the banks are true.  It was disturbing.
There were a few things we could have even taken to court if we wanted to continue in that bubble.
We actually paid one company to modify a loan that was changed back in 30 days to an even higher amount.
We saw some bad stuff,  but the banks aren't the ones that have to sleep at night.  We do.
Very hard.
In the end, we sold a few and lost a few.  And the credit that took fifteen years to build, didn't
take long to get hit.
Hit like a hurricane in the middle of....well, hurricane season.
In a world like today, if you have stayed in the game, be thankful.
But if you haven't, please know, it will all be okay.
We are here, still breathing, still happy.
And financially, although there is nothing BIG monetarily (anymore) for our future, that has plenty of time
to change.  And oh well if it doesn't. 
Our family is larger than life, we will still HAVE a beautiful future.
We don't feel special.  Many people went through what we did, but you need to
keep your head in the game....learn some lessons-even if it was simply, "the times".
Like I said, we haven't used a card (except debit), no car payments, and we are re-building
our credit, thankful that we are still young enough to be able.
We are all here, a life planned for each of us.  Go with it..know it is for a purpose.
At the end of the day, don't be the woman thinking about the Jones'.
When you shut your door at night, what is between those walls is the most important thing.
Teach you kids about "real life".  Tell them how great it  is to dream and to not be scared to take
the chance.  If you fall, you tried, and you'll be standing stronger because of it.
But most of all, the best lessons are those after hardships.
Many people think obstacles occur to throw you off track.  Not at all. 
The twists and turns of fate will make your ride here more meaningful. 
And nothing will build your character more.
We showed our kids a lot about life during those years.  Yes, it was difficult and embarrassing at times.
But I'm a firm believer that when things aren't going your way, it is a good thing for kids to see.
Look what happened when stuff fell apart; Mom and Dad talked a lot about plans, kept
holding hands and we survived.
We may not have been thrilled while it was happening, but it happened.  And business is great now.
Why not talk about it?  It is what it is. 
Maybe your story isn't financial, maybe it's an addiction or other struggle.
Tell someone.  It may just make them feel better about their life, to not feel alone about things.
Remember, it's easy to be thankful when all is well-
Next time you see who you think are the Jones', remind yourself it just may not be what it seems.
And love your life, the way it is, no matter what it is, because of what you have today.
Hugs!

HARDEST THING-

Well, today I'm just going to quickly rant and rave about my Facebook status- 
the hardest thing about raising eight kids.
The hardest thing is:
Not the bickering, or the refereeing that goes along with that.
Although I spend many a day being a small shuttle service, it's not the driving.
And as much laundry that there will always be for me to do, it's not even that.
(although it surely comes a very close second).
THE HARDEST thing, by far, in this house, is EXPLAINING to my sons why they need to
wear a winter coat, every single day of winter.
WHAT THE HECK?  Does it end?  EVER?
It starts around here, somewhere between Thanksgiving and Christmas, during second grade.
And from there, until, well, either I stop debating, or just simply stop caring about it.
The beast that is my daily enemy. 
From the time they are getting their backpacks, until they
have lost the morning battle-
It is the creator of the frown, slumped shoulders, and one last, I'M THE ONLY KID THAT
HAS TO, as they are defeated once again, walking to the bus stop like
they just lost their baseball championship game.
My rule with the important things around here has always been a trueness to "fields I'm willing to die on".
There will be so many things in my kids' lives that go on-year to year. 
What other parents do or say really
isn't a concern to me,  they will use that to try and convince you that other parents let THEIR kids.
Whateverrrr....there are eight of you and what goes on with the Smith family just isn't gonna work
around here...
I weigh each thing carefully, wanting the things I am willing to fight for to be taken seriously. 
That's why I choose to let the other things, slide. 
The "no biggies". 
We all have them, but in every family, they differ.
It helps to show them the things that are important to us, that they can do, or not do.
And yes, usually in large families, there are many more on that side of the list-
Because, frankly, we'd be yelling at someone, at all hours, for something, if we weren't more
laid back then the norm. 
That has been able to create fun and laughter but balance in the things that just aren't gonna be happening around here.
Yes, we are like the movie CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN-
If you don't like the circus, get out of our tent. :)  haha.
So we expect a little from them, and give a little to them, in may topics of discussion...
especially those blessed teenage years.
Example: The girls are allowed to get piercings done on their ears, as many as they want...
Some they do themselves, some they've gotten done. 
I don't care if they have two or three, whatever...I did that. 
Even one high up on that area at the top-I forget what it's called. 
Knock yourselves out, and they look adorable..(we trust that they aren't going to make themselves look crazy)
But the other side is no nose, or bellybutton.  
Because they see us lax on part of it, there's not much discussion on the rest-
I'm not giving in or kissing butt, it's just what seems to work .
And since you're not super strict on everything, they really are understanding with the things that
we aren't diggin.
But having said that, this is just a talk with NO END!
The only one that we have come upon that doesn't die-lol
With these boys of mine, nothing I have ever said with the coats, matters. 
It's just not an option-when there are inches of snow, and school is delayed and you are sliding
your way to the bus, (call me crazy but) you need to have a coat that is thicker than a
long sleeved tee.
I have lectured about the weather, how cold they will be waiting outside, the fact that their
school wants it, and what the other students wear is like this. 
NOTHING. 
They HATE winter coats.
Their latest attempt failed- when trying to pull their sweatshirt hoods up and wear gloves,
thinking it's gonna make this disguise of theirs pass, as they walk by me.
Ummm....noooo fellas.
I dont' need a reason, I understand that. 
But as every parent knows, it's so much easier if they get it. 
Not only to have the silence in the matter, but if they understand, they see why, even if they don't agree.
I see that will just not be happening in this area of our lives.
One day it will be a story to tell, but for now?
The answer, every morning, is, BECAUSE IT'S WINTER, AND BECAUSE I SAID SO.
Those words we all swore we'd never say.  
We have become our parents---and it's just too funny.
Thanks for listening! :)
Hugs!